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bguyParticipantAugust 2, 2017 at 11:46 pm #144116
I know online dating is a jungle. I’ve been doing it for more than a decade, sometimes with success and sometimes not.
Recently, I was being nice to a woman as usual just talking about her interests on a site [POF]. At one point, she said the online site wasn’t going well, that she apparently received a lot of messages from rude men.
But then she became rude to me for no reason. She suddenly messaged me that she hopes I find what I want. I was a little dumbfounded because I thought the chat was going well. I messaged her once more just to be sure she didn’t want any more communication, just asking if she grew up in the area.
Then, she blocked me.
OK, I know not to take this personally. But I don’t get blocked since I’m not one of those men who immediately talks about supposedly how endowed he is and how she would be lucky to be with him. So this kind of threw me.
Has anyone else ever been blocked on a dating site after being nice and not the typical sex-hungry guy?
bguyParticipantAugust 3, 2017 at 12:58 am #144117
I’ll just add that if she had not replied to my second message that would be fine. I would take the hint that she didn’t like me for whatever reason. But there was no reason to block me. All I did was ask a simple question to make sure it was clear she didn’t want me messaging her anymore [her loss].
It wasn’t really clear with the message in which she stated she hoped I found what I wanted – that could mean she didn’t want to date but might still be open to being friendly. Blocking in this case seems rude and over the top.
jeffgranbyParticipantAugust 4, 2017 at 11:32 am #144292
You should be nice but not too nice I mean in my experience that scares girls off.. For some reason they like jerks who are good men. Or maybe she is just stupid and doesn’t know what she wants
richiroParticipantAugust 4, 2017 at 11:43 am #144296
without knowing the details of the conversations – it’s impossible to tell.
a comment ould’ve been taken the wrong way.
maybe she had a bad day (be it dating or reali life) and just had to lash out for some reason or was over-sensitive.
the key here is this… the biggest mistake we ALL make is to assume OUR perspective is reality. Yes.. YOU may have thought things were “going well” but she may not have. Reality is the reality/perspective of ALL parties, not just our own. So.. you might have missed something ( you probaly did).
The comment about being “too nice” is also true. “too nice” can come off as creepy especially to females. I can’t explain it more than – females have a completely different standard experience than guys when it comes to heterosexual dating – so they’ve “learned” and “developed” certain defense mechanisms that us males will never underestand. “nice” is usually not a positive, especially “too nice”.
TengoBeaParticipantAugust 4, 2017 at 5:35 pm #144350
Hey man its alright, if you guyes didnt met each other and cough feelings than youre good, it happenes sometimes but thrust me, you will forget about her
CantCYParticipantAugust 14, 2017 at 10:54 pm #145486
It could be something as simple as she sees you online to much.
anna9313ParticipantAugust 15, 2017 at 2:46 am #145508
Goodmorbing. Unfortunately we don’t knie whi is really behind a computer or phone screen even thogh there might be a picture. We dont know what is going on. So the best you can do is not to have any hard feelings ☺
els17ParticipantAugust 25, 2017 at 5:49 am #146931
Stay true to you and please dont take it personally. For some people it’s just a defense mechanism to get out of the dating sites, she may not have blocked you but deleted her account. Definately keep doing what youre doing and you’ll find that person who will be as polite as you. 🙂
LoneWolfParticipantSeptember 7, 2017 at 11:12 pm #148557
While I have yet to use any dating sites, I’ve been blocked by people on other websites for stupid reasons, if there was any reason at all. Sometimes people can be oversensitive like that; if they don’t want to be in contact with you then so be it.
new to datingParticipantSeptember 9, 2017 at 10:44 pm #148677
whos knows ppl have have issues and will do anything to stroke their egos, don’t read into it too much thinking it was you
Alabama2ParticipantSeptember 10, 2017 at 1:55 pm #148682
some girls can tell by feelings if they find the guy sympatetic or not. you probably werent that for her, so she just chose this way to end contact with you
ladygirlParticipantSeptember 11, 2017 at 12:08 pm #148698
We get tired of pervert in those apps..sometimes we generalize and assume that all men that text us are looking for the same.
JennishellieParticipantSeptember 12, 2017 at 6:51 am #148732
When your behind a computer screen it’s easy to just do things like block people without having to justify, give a good reason for it. It can be insensitive especially when you haven’t don’t anything wrong…some people get bored quickly, or maybe she just made up her mind suddenly about what she was looking for.
ikasawakParticipantSeptember 13, 2017 at 6:03 am #148840
Have been in the same situation as the woman you’re describing. I think her last message to you was probably sent in a ‘goodbye’ way and wasn’t an invitation to respond.
Yes it’s easy to hit the block button, but with the amount of creeps that are online it’s a necessity sometimes. Maybe she thought that by responding when she didn’t word her message as an invitation to that you hadn’t read or taken on board what she had said.
If someone said to me what she’d said to you, I’d leave it at that and have not replied back asking what had already been stated.
I hope that makes sense.
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